Traditionally the month of February is about showing others how much we love them, but I'm going to invite you to show yourself a whole lot of love! A lot of times we self sabotage or make excuses for ignoring our own self care, one of the big things that gets in the way is the dreaded 'selfish' word. The dictionary definition is 'devoted to or caring only for oneself, concerned primarily with one's own interests , benefits, welfare etc., regardless of others' and 'characterized by or manifesting concern or care only for oneself.' If we simply take out the word ONLY from both of those descriptions it sounds like the best ideas in the world!!
We truthfully should be devoted to ourselves, our interests, benefits, and welfare, because if we don't who will? and how will someone else ever be able to take care of you, if you don't know how you love to receive care! You will be able to be the best version of yourself if you practice and embrace who you are and what makes your heart sing, and as you develop the habit of doing this every single day, you will be able to be more present and loving to those around you.
We continue to live in a place of deficit, we feel like we don't have enough time, sleep, money or love, and we try to get things done in our daily lives from that place of exhaustion, pain and frustration and so far it hasn't been working out all that well for you. So I am proposing something different, begin being selfish in small ways, and start letting the idea of outward perfection go, and embracing inner satisfaction one step at a time.
I know that we think we have to do everything right now or else it won't get done, but sometimes we have to make a different choice, I promise you if you don't get to the dishes today, they will be there tomorrow (so will the laundry, facebook, the ability to check your emails etc.), but reading a chapter of a book that makes you happy, having a longer bath, going to bed 15 minutes earlier, meditating, taking the long way home so you can sing to your favorite songs in the car, getting a massage, going for a float, doing what ever it is that you need in the moment will allow you to feel life in a more harmonious and peaceful way. * I'm not saying that you have to put everything off all the time, just start off with one day a week every week this month, that you choose to do one thing for yourself, then next month try this out two times a week and keep it going as often as you can until it becomes second nature for you to do!
Once I began to practice the art of selfishness I started to be able to take care of other people in a healthy way, I no longer feel resentful of taking care of others, and it is actually something that comes from a place of love and joy, and anytime that feeling changes into something less pleasant I can look at where I am not taking care of my needs, make a better choice, and go back to feeling better. I feel like I am also coming from a place of abundance and I am able to be more present to those around me, and when I choose to consciously spend time with others, it is more meaningful because I am not thinking about what is on my list, or when I can get home and go to bed.
One of the ways I have used to help remind me that I need to think about what I need in this moment, is to set a reminder for a time in the day where I know I will have the space to do something for me. I set it on my phone, and it also goes off when I arrive home, so as soon as I walk in the door I ask myself "what do I need for me right now?" and sometimes the answer is to do the dishes, or to drink a big glass of water, have something nourishing to eat, or to sit down and do nothing for the next 30 minutes, or to write the wonderful thoughts swirling around my head down.
And most importantly, know that you deserve to take some time for yourself to show yourself some love.
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