I know that when we think of our bodies it is often in the sense of I don't like this, I would love to change that, this is ugly, I am ugly, I am overweight, I just can't seem to lose weight, get in shape, feel good about myself. If you take a moment to think of your body as if it were a small child this is probably what has played out: it has not gotten enough loving attention, so the first thing it does is do everything it can to draw attention to to itself - which is often the source of random pains, muscular discomfort, and even mild digestive problems. The result is getting more frustrated or unhappy with your body, because not only is it not beautiful, now it doesn't feel good either. Because that didn't work at all, it starts taking more extreme action, because if the attention is on too much weight for example, the body then, will take whatever attention it can get, so it will create more of what you don't want, because it brings even more attention to it. Which then creates more disharmony and negative feelings and increases the effects of this cycle.
There is also the worry and fear around this that if we accept and love our bodies and send it heaps of love as it is, that it will stay the same, and the change we want to see will not happen. This is simply not true.
I invite anyone who this resonates with, to try the following practice out, and stick with it for a minimum of 40 days.
Before you get out of bed in the morning, or before you go to sleep at night (or even when you are stuck in traffic! or a time that works well for you) Start at your toes, wiggle them or just focus your awareness on them, and say either in your head or out loud, I love my toes, then move to the soles of the foot, I love the soles of my feet, I love the tops of my feet, I love my ankles, lower legs, knees, thighs, hips, pelvis, groin, sacrum, spine - lower, middle and upper, my whole back, abdomen, chest, shoulders, arms - upper, forearms, wrists, hands, fingers, neck, throat, jaw, mouth, tongue, nose, cheeks, eyes, ears, forehead, scalp, skull, brain, nerves, lungs, heart, stomach, spleen liver, gallbladder, kidneys, small and large intestines, bowels, bladder, prostate/uterus, reproductive organs, skin, hair, muscles, bones, cells, chakras, energy, soul. ** it is really important to say I love my... before each part.
This may seem like a lot or like it will take a lot of time - it honestly takes me 1 minute 42 seconds to go through the whole process. It may take a little longer at first while you are trying to remember all the parts, but it will come quickly in no time!
While you are doing this, try your best to tune into your body and see how you feel, you may experience some discomfort in the beginning, but stick with it and see how you are feeling week after week!
Monday, November 10, 2014
Sunday, September 14, 2014
12 Tips for Building or Enhancing a Meditation Practice
1. It is called a practice for a reason! Be gentle with yourself if you have a mind that wanders frequently, it is perfectly normal! Your mind has been able to do what it wants for as long as you have been alive, it takes time and practice to get out of this habit!
2. In the beginning, your body will also rebel, it is normal to get physically uncomfortable within the first 10 minutes of a mediation practice, and that is okay too. Take the time to try out different cushions, chairs, and positions and find what works the best for you, and supports your body.
3. You don't have to meditate for an hour to consider it mediation! If you find that your mind and body get uncomfortable and rebel after 5 minutes of meditation and want to stop, that's okay. The more frequent you practice, the longer you will be able to sit for. If you try to sit and focus for an hour to start, you will set yourself up for failure and undermine your whole meditation experience (and your practice). Start small and work your way up to longer and longer times.
4. Use a focusing tool, whether it is a mantra (om and so hum are great), a thought, feeling, or idea ( love, peace, calm, centered, connected), an affirmation ( I am calm, I am healthy, I am sacred) be creative, change it as you see fit, and find ones that really resonate and speak to you.
5. Use breathing to calm the body and focus the mind, check this out for info on breathing
6. Use guided meditations - find an app, listen to Deepak Chopra (him and Oprah have free meditation series regularly keep an eye out for them they are really great!) Find some on iTunes, or find some at 'New Age' stores or Yoga studios, find meditation classes (I lead a monthly one at Omnia Wellness)
7. Do some research, there are different forms of meditation, some are sitting, standing, walking, moving. Find different styles that you can try, so days when you are physically uncomfortable you can try movement or walking.
8. Carve out time in your day to dedicate to yourself, and your practice. If the morning before work, in the evening before bed, outside in the sun on a sunny day (or inside if it is winter!), find what time of day works for you and go with that, don't try to get it done in the morning if you aren't a morning person!
9. It's okay if you miss a day! Don't let missing a day or two throw your practice off completely, do your best to start back again as soon as you can (again, even if it is for 5 minutes, it'll make a difference)
10. Spend a few moments near the end of your meditation with gratitude, for yourself for doing it, for your mind for focusing, for your body for relaxing, and add in anything else you are grateful for. This helps your mind and body to know that meditation = gratitude, happiness, and calmness!
11. End your meditation with grounding. Imagine your energy connecting to the energy at the center of the earth, and allow yourself to ground and connect into that energy, then allow it to come through your physical body bringing that feeling of being grounded with it. Connect into the physical sense of your body, wiggle fingers and toes, then gently open your eyes and take a few deep breaths to bring your full awareness into the present!
12. Have Fun! Do what ever you can to make it the most enjoyable experience possible! Create a sacred space, burn candles, use an incense or an oil that you love, imagine yourself in a place in nature that you love like a forest, beach, cave, or at the top of a mountain, let your imagination take you anywhere!
Happy Meditating!
2. In the beginning, your body will also rebel, it is normal to get physically uncomfortable within the first 10 minutes of a mediation practice, and that is okay too. Take the time to try out different cushions, chairs, and positions and find what works the best for you, and supports your body.
3. You don't have to meditate for an hour to consider it mediation! If you find that your mind and body get uncomfortable and rebel after 5 minutes of meditation and want to stop, that's okay. The more frequent you practice, the longer you will be able to sit for. If you try to sit and focus for an hour to start, you will set yourself up for failure and undermine your whole meditation experience (and your practice). Start small and work your way up to longer and longer times.
4. Use a focusing tool, whether it is a mantra (om and so hum are great), a thought, feeling, or idea ( love, peace, calm, centered, connected), an affirmation ( I am calm, I am healthy, I am sacred) be creative, change it as you see fit, and find ones that really resonate and speak to you.
5. Use breathing to calm the body and focus the mind, check this out for info on breathing
6. Use guided meditations - find an app, listen to Deepak Chopra (him and Oprah have free meditation series regularly keep an eye out for them they are really great!) Find some on iTunes, or find some at 'New Age' stores or Yoga studios, find meditation classes (I lead a monthly one at Omnia Wellness)
7. Do some research, there are different forms of meditation, some are sitting, standing, walking, moving. Find different styles that you can try, so days when you are physically uncomfortable you can try movement or walking.
8. Carve out time in your day to dedicate to yourself, and your practice. If the morning before work, in the evening before bed, outside in the sun on a sunny day (or inside if it is winter!), find what time of day works for you and go with that, don't try to get it done in the morning if you aren't a morning person!
9. It's okay if you miss a day! Don't let missing a day or two throw your practice off completely, do your best to start back again as soon as you can (again, even if it is for 5 minutes, it'll make a difference)
10. Spend a few moments near the end of your meditation with gratitude, for yourself for doing it, for your mind for focusing, for your body for relaxing, and add in anything else you are grateful for. This helps your mind and body to know that meditation = gratitude, happiness, and calmness!
11. End your meditation with grounding. Imagine your energy connecting to the energy at the center of the earth, and allow yourself to ground and connect into that energy, then allow it to come through your physical body bringing that feeling of being grounded with it. Connect into the physical sense of your body, wiggle fingers and toes, then gently open your eyes and take a few deep breaths to bring your full awareness into the present!
12. Have Fun! Do what ever you can to make it the most enjoyable experience possible! Create a sacred space, burn candles, use an incense or an oil that you love, imagine yourself in a place in nature that you love like a forest, beach, cave, or at the top of a mountain, let your imagination take you anywhere!
Happy Meditating!
Friday, September 12, 2014
How To Breathe
I know it sounds strange to write a how-to for something your body does all by itself without really needing input, but an interesting thing happens when we start to feel stress, we stop taking normal breaths and start breathing really shallow, and it is mostly focused in the upper chest. When we actually take a moment to stop and breathe, it allows our nervous system to go from its fight/flight response to its happier rest/digest mode. It gives the mind an opportunity to really assess the situation and realize you aren't in imminent danger (unless of course you are, in which case, breathing may not be your first choice of actions to take!) this allows the body to follow suit, and stop releasing stress induced hormones, and allow the body's natural process to continue to work in an optimal way.
quick and easy breathing techniques:
**please note that deep breathing can lead to dizziness - if you feel dizzy at any point, simply stop and let your breathing return to normal until the feeling passes.
You can inhale and exhale through either your nose or mouth - which ever is more comfortable for you.
3 part breath
1-inhale into the belly - focus on pushing your belly out as far as it can comfortably go and then naturally let yourself exhale when your belly feels full
2- inhale into your rib cage - place your hands on the sides of your ribs and focus on pushing them away from your body, again allowing yourself to gently and naturally exhale
3- inhale into the top of your chest - place your hand on your sternum (right in the top center part of your chest) and focus on lifting your hand/chest upwards, again exhaling easily and naturally.
Then combine all three parts together - inhale into the belly, then the ribs, then the chest all in one big deep breath. Repeat 3-5 times
Relaxation Breath
Sit in a comfortable position. Take 3-5 deep breaths and on each exhale think about (and allow) your body to relax into the chair you are sitting on, you can also do this in bed before you go to sleep.
You can also focus your awareness on different parts of your body with each breath - inhale while focusing on your legs, and as you exhale feel the muscles in your legs relax etc., also great if you have an area of your body that is in pain, you can breathe the whole time focusing on that area's relaxation and pain reduction.
Counting Breath
Great for if you are feeling overwhelmed, really angry or really stressed. This helps to focus the mind by giving it something to do instead of over thinking about what is stressing you out. Inhale for a count of 4, hold your breath for a count of 4, exhale for a count of 4. You can change the count # to begin always start with a lower number, as you practice this you can gradually increase it as you feel comfortable.
Energy Breath
This is great for releasing negative energy and bringing in positive energy. Close your eyes, as you inhale imagine a bright white light coming into your body, as you exhale allow any negative energy to leave your body - you can imagine it however you like, smoke, butterflies, a color. As you continue, on your inhalations picture this white light going through your body, your bones, muscles, cells, into your energy system and then at the end, creating a protective bubble around you that keeps light energy in, and any energy you don't want, out.
Try different breaths out and see which one(s) resonate with you! These are also great to help you get to sleep, or to start your meditation practice (the Energy Breath can be a meditation all on its own!)
Wishing you Happy Breathing!!
quick and easy breathing techniques:
**please note that deep breathing can lead to dizziness - if you feel dizzy at any point, simply stop and let your breathing return to normal until the feeling passes.
You can inhale and exhale through either your nose or mouth - which ever is more comfortable for you.
3 part breath
1-inhale into the belly - focus on pushing your belly out as far as it can comfortably go and then naturally let yourself exhale when your belly feels full
2- inhale into your rib cage - place your hands on the sides of your ribs and focus on pushing them away from your body, again allowing yourself to gently and naturally exhale
3- inhale into the top of your chest - place your hand on your sternum (right in the top center part of your chest) and focus on lifting your hand/chest upwards, again exhaling easily and naturally.
Then combine all three parts together - inhale into the belly, then the ribs, then the chest all in one big deep breath. Repeat 3-5 times
Relaxation Breath
Sit in a comfortable position. Take 3-5 deep breaths and on each exhale think about (and allow) your body to relax into the chair you are sitting on, you can also do this in bed before you go to sleep.
You can also focus your awareness on different parts of your body with each breath - inhale while focusing on your legs, and as you exhale feel the muscles in your legs relax etc., also great if you have an area of your body that is in pain, you can breathe the whole time focusing on that area's relaxation and pain reduction.
Counting Breath
Great for if you are feeling overwhelmed, really angry or really stressed. This helps to focus the mind by giving it something to do instead of over thinking about what is stressing you out. Inhale for a count of 4, hold your breath for a count of 4, exhale for a count of 4. You can change the count # to begin always start with a lower number, as you practice this you can gradually increase it as you feel comfortable.
Energy Breath
This is great for releasing negative energy and bringing in positive energy. Close your eyes, as you inhale imagine a bright white light coming into your body, as you exhale allow any negative energy to leave your body - you can imagine it however you like, smoke, butterflies, a color. As you continue, on your inhalations picture this white light going through your body, your bones, muscles, cells, into your energy system and then at the end, creating a protective bubble around you that keeps light energy in, and any energy you don't want, out.
Try different breaths out and see which one(s) resonate with you! These are also great to help you get to sleep, or to start your meditation practice (the Energy Breath can be a meditation all on its own!)
Wishing you Happy Breathing!!
Monday, May 5, 2014
A Formula For Self Care
The topic of self care has come up a lot in my life recently, it seems to be one of the themes of this year for me. Often we put ourselves last in the care for column, we make sure that those around us are cared for and don't worry about ourselves until we absolutely have to and don't have a whole lot of energy left to spare. I am definitely guilty of this! so, I decided to do my best to take care of myself, and to put self care as a priority in my day to day life. So if this is something that resonates with you, here are a few things I did to help make it easier for me:
- Take some time to write a list of things you love to do for yourself - I love food, so eating a good meal is something that I love (even if its not super healthy!), meditation, writing, having a nap, catching up on tv that I really like, reading a for fun/self empowerment/personal growth book, walking/being in nature, giving myself permission to be entirely unproductive for an evening, are a few of the things on my list. A lot of these are things that I can do that help me recharge and relax.
- Set a reminder in your calender/phone to remind you to do something for yourself, and make sure you put it at a time in the day where you can do something about it.
- Check in with yourself and see what feels right, and be really honest with yourself! Just because you haven't meditated in two days, and you feel like you should, but you feel restless, means that a walk may be better for you! Or maybe you really want to eat a bowl of ice cream, do it and don't feel guilty about it!
- Sign up for a weekly or monthly class that is something that love to do, pottery, dance, yoga. It helps to keep you committed to yourself.
- Have support from your friends, family, partner, children, coworkers. Let people know what your up to and get their help to keep you accountable, or have them join you on the self care journey. Talk about what you're doing, and included those you love connecting with in the things that you can (sharing a meal, going to a class together)
- Give yourself permission to throw out the things that aren't working for you, or change things up if you stop getting enjoyment out of it.
So that's it, that is what I do to take care of me. It really is true, that the more you take care of yourself, the better you can care for everyone else.
- Take some time to write a list of things you love to do for yourself - I love food, so eating a good meal is something that I love (even if its not super healthy!), meditation, writing, having a nap, catching up on tv that I really like, reading a for fun/self empowerment/personal growth book, walking/being in nature, giving myself permission to be entirely unproductive for an evening, are a few of the things on my list. A lot of these are things that I can do that help me recharge and relax.
- Set a reminder in your calender/phone to remind you to do something for yourself, and make sure you put it at a time in the day where you can do something about it.
- Check in with yourself and see what feels right, and be really honest with yourself! Just because you haven't meditated in two days, and you feel like you should, but you feel restless, means that a walk may be better for you! Or maybe you really want to eat a bowl of ice cream, do it and don't feel guilty about it!
- Sign up for a weekly or monthly class that is something that love to do, pottery, dance, yoga. It helps to keep you committed to yourself.
- Have support from your friends, family, partner, children, coworkers. Let people know what your up to and get their help to keep you accountable, or have them join you on the self care journey. Talk about what you're doing, and included those you love connecting with in the things that you can (sharing a meal, going to a class together)
- Give yourself permission to throw out the things that aren't working for you, or change things up if you stop getting enjoyment out of it.
So that's it, that is what I do to take care of me. It really is true, that the more you take care of yourself, the better you can care for everyone else.
Thursday, March 20, 2014
The Importance of Having Compassion With Understanding
If we seek to understand with our minds and our intellect, we may think we understand, but we do so with judgement, because that is what the intellectual mind does , makes judgements about situations to make logical assessments so we can decide what to do, and what is right or wrong based on our own thoughts, ideas and experiences.
We may think what we judge is true and right, which leads us to think we understand.
This is not understanding.
This is judgement.
When we bring compassion into the mix, when we open our hearts to the person or the situation, when we put our selves into the feeling of the situation ( so we feel vs think ) and employ kindness and compassion for everyone involved regardless of their role, regardless of OUR judgement of right or wrong, healthy vs unhealthy, then we can truly realize that "understanding" doesn't matter. Being supportive and loving to a fellow human being is better for all involved, instead of saying "I totally get it, I understand what you're going through" which can make a persons journey seem insignificant in that moment, because we can't really know, we haven't lived it first hand, we can sympathize, we can empathize, but we don't KNOW. Instead, just be present, listen and offer your support -which may be sharing part of your story to express camaraderie, or what worked for you to get better, just do it with the intention of helping, instead of the idea of understanding, and let what they choose to do with that go.
We may think what we judge is true and right, which leads us to think we understand.
This is not understanding.
This is judgement.
This makes it about your ego.
When we bring compassion into the mix, when we open our hearts to the person or the situation, when we put our selves into the feeling of the situation ( so we feel vs think ) and employ kindness and compassion for everyone involved regardless of their role, regardless of OUR judgement of right or wrong, healthy vs unhealthy, then we can truly realize that "understanding" doesn't matter. Being supportive and loving to a fellow human being is better for all involved, instead of saying "I totally get it, I understand what you're going through" which can make a persons journey seem insignificant in that moment, because we can't really know, we haven't lived it first hand, we can sympathize, we can empathize, but we don't KNOW. Instead, just be present, listen and offer your support -which may be sharing part of your story to express camaraderie, or what worked for you to get better, just do it with the intention of helping, instead of the idea of understanding, and let what they choose to do with that go.
If you find that someone else's actions or choices go against what you think is right, take that as an opportunity to express compassion anyway, a chance to send them love anyway, a moment to realize that what they (or you) are going through is probably bigger than the both of you and has a purpose that you just can't see yet.
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